Lessons By Moonlight Blog

The holiday season or what is often called the season of giving is coming to an end.  During the month of December thousands of people had warm fuzzies across the world as they gave to those who have less than most other people.    Hunger does not end at Christmas, abuse shelters and homeless shelters still have needs beyond Christmas, and a child that is living at a local children’s home would still appreciate a toy or coloring book beyond the season.  What am I rambling on about? 

It is this….please consider allowing the spirit of giving to continue in your life through the remainder of the year and into the next.  Yes, there are people who take advantage, but there are a lot more people who don’t and so many times those are the people who never ask for help. 

Find a cause that you are passionate about, one that gives you butterflies and help that cause.  You don’t have to help everyday or not even every week.  Perhaps once a month or once every few months…. as long a you give. 

Come on, let;s keep those warm fuzzies flowing.  Any act of kindness or thoughtfulness counts!

Last Friday, I stood at the vending machine watching the smokers go out for their mid morning fix of nicotine.  I scoffed at them and thought to myself, there they go to kill themselves.   I made my selection, E7 – gotta get that Snickers Bar!  As I took the bar out of the drop slot, I stood there holding two Snickers Bars in each hand, then it hit me…..

This revelation hit me soooo hard I wanted to run away immediately.  How can you run away from a truth that is wrapped all around you?

The revelation is that I am an addict. My addiction is not nicotine, sex, heroine, or alcohol….it is food.

I use food the same way that a junkie would use a drug… to escape, to escape whatever I can’t or won’t deal with.  I eat my emotions, happy, sad, disappointed, anger, frustration, worry…..

I weighed myself on Saturday night and in disbelief I just stood there thinking about how I could have gotten to this point.  

It ends here.

Being overweight is the most visible sign of not being in control of an area of your life.  I have taken that control back!  Food is not a comfort, it is not my friend, it does not end heartache….food is not a band-aid for life.  Food is nutrition for your body and you have to be selective about what you eat.

Since Saturday I have lost almost seven pounds and I am so excited to keep this going.  I am ready to shed this heavy garment and start to look and feel sexy again….yes I said sexy!

Before I sign off here, let me ask you this…. Do you struggle with your weight?  If so, what are you eating?  Guilt, anger, hurt, frustration, loss…..

Step 1:  The next time you snack on something ask yourself if you are hungry or self-soothing with food.

This is a journey, a process – so this blog is not going to end here….there is more to come on the way back to a healthier you….. and me.

Christmas Memories…..
Just a wee tot sitting in my wooden rocking chair square in front of the TV, orange/green plaid bell bottoms, orange turtle neck, and my very fashionable brown leather boots. My dad was bringing in goodies from my Aunt Helen’s house…oh the smells of cookies and huge oranges and apples. I looked around at the tree, felt the warmth from the fireplace, heard my parents in the next room…and then this commercial came on that I will never forget. It always bring back such wonderful memories of feeling safe, warm, and completely loved…..

I started taking belly dance classes many years ago, but I stopped because a trusted friend told me that belly dancing is a sin.  Well, I think it depends on what you do with the art.  I just loved the movement and how it connected with my femininity.  I was not going to dance at clubs, parties, or in public, just for me and well maybe a spouse one day (blushing….) So, I started taking lessons again.  Last evening the instructor showed the group this video and said that this should be our goal in our own unique way.
What – this lady is an incredible dancer!  I can take that challenge though and will enjoy the wait loss that is coming with it.  Belly dance may not be for everyone, but it is an outlet for me and one that really makes me glad that I am a lady (in my Shenaynay voice  lol).

Bottomline:  Continue to find things that you enjoy and do them.  Belly dancing is controversial in some circles but again, it is what you do with it that makes the difference between a hobby and going to confession!

Peace

Some folks want the role, but they refuse to play their part……

I was covering the front desk at the office this afternoon when a florist delivered a beautiful boquet of flowers.  Immediately, my heart started pitter pattering and I thought, maybe juuuuuuust maybe those flowers were for me. 

They weren’t.

Am I surprised?  No, unless I have a secret admirer – there is no one who would be sending me such a lovely arrangement of flowers. 

The good part is that I don’t get sad about it anymore, instead I find myself smiling with a glimmer of hope in mind….that perhaps one day when I am least expecting it…..that soft, fragrant expression of love will arrive with my name on it.

I would rather make a thousand mistakes and learn and grow from each them, than to stay stagnant and imprisoned in one mistake.

Yes, I am introvert!!!  (standing on a mountain top, beating my chest – okay that is a bit much lol)

One of the most common misconceptions about introverts is that they don’t like people. Not true,  I love people.  I am captivated by their stories, the fellowship and I am compelled to reach out to inspire, learn from, and help people.  I love parties and gatherings, BUT, being around people is draining for an introvert.  Soooo….if I step away for a few minutes it is only to recharge with my owns thoughts, some quiet, and then I am as good as new.

For years, I have been told that there is something wrong with me.  Well I could say the same of extroverts, come on, what is wrong with these people?   You know, those super hype people who want to know exactly why you aren’t “hype” like them and then proceed to try to make you super hype to validate their insanity?  lol 

Bottomline my fellow innies, know, love, appreciate how you are, and while it is important to bend, don’t allow the others to push your boundaries too too far.  The world needs you!  Can you imagine a world FULL of extroverts, oh goodness no!   Now come on – let’s go ponder the universe. 

(BTW – pondering the universe is one of my favorite things to do…it really is – I get butterflies just thinking about it)

Sometimes the elephant in the room is not the biggest problem…  sometimes it is the people who are ignoring it,  sometimes it is smaller things, the things that are not seen that present the biggest problems…. just pondering.